tri fit family: The end of an Incredible year at the Xterra World Championship's 2012

I stood there for a moment, looking out at the surf trying to "understand" the power of the ocean. Surrounding me, was the buzz and excitement of 800 Xterra athletes eagerly awaiting the start of this race and I was contemplating walking away. "Is this worth it? The waves are so big, The coast guard warns of strong currents and big swells. I have an uncomfortable amount of sand in my tri-suit. I hadn't yet seen Trevor and the kids...... AND, I have 5 days of vacation left in this beautiful place that I want to be here for!" As I looked to my right, I spot Lizzy and shout out. She offers a much needed embrace as we exchange words of encouragement.

Moments before, I had been pounded by the surf as I came to shore from my warm-up. As I was tossed and turned for what seemed like forever, I remembered the advice a friend shared with me the night before. " If you get tossed around, get your hands in front of your face, to save it from slamming against the sand." My arms went up, and in an instant I was flipped upside down, around and around and was slammed down on the base of my neck. Ouch. That hurt. But more than a physical pain, it really scared me.

As I walked out of the surf, obviously defeated, an Xterra Official was right there to greet me. He had seen what had just happened, and was very kind and gentle while doing his best to comfort me. "You will be O.K." he says. " We have plenty of medical personell on hand if you need it. Just race safe and everything will be fine."

The waves were big, much taller than me, and after being evacuated from our condo the night before due to a tsunami warning, I was pretty freaked out.

I managed to pull myself together. I ignored the uncomfortable, scratchy, heavy sand and for a moment, tuned out all the noise and excitement. For this minute, it was just me standing there weighing the importance of this race.

I was here. In Maui. Standing on a beach with 800 other trained athletes all who probably were having similar conversations with themselves and their demons. Today will be challenging, and I'll take it, and at the same time do so cautiously. I will be here to enjoy my vacation!

After a couple deep and relaxing breathes and a few very kind words to myself the cannon sounded, and I was off.

The race went like this:

1. I had the best swim start of my triathlon career, but then I ran into people and currents and my own anxiety. I was glad that I did not quit, because I really, really, really wanted to at least a few times.
2. I did not get pounded by the surf. Although Trevor, who was watching on shore was legitimately worried that I may not come back.
3. The bike course was very congested with other athletes and I had a really hard time getting into any sort of rhythm.

4. I made a shifting error which resulted in a dropped chain. From that point on, I could not get the darn thing to stay on. I dropped it another 3 or 4 times.
5. I lost motivation, but eventually found it again.
6. I felt grateful to be there. Grateful to be competing in this event. Grateful to be healthy enough to do so. I felt so grateful to my husband who has allowed me the time and the money to train and compete. And by acknowledging my gratitude, I had a blast finishing this race.
7. The run on the beach felt amazing, and I loved seeing my family and friends on the finish line.

8. I did it!

Obviously, the race did not go the way I had hoped, but my kids were as proud of me if I stood high on the podium. Alleck with his face beaming with joy ran to me after checking the result table. He was obviously excited to share the news. I placed fifth out of 35 women in my age group! I could see right away, that he was proud. "Your were 5th mom!!" I set all pride and disappointment aside and for that moment, enjoyed my accomplishment with him. Yes, I placed fifth and under the circumstances I am very happy about that.

We immediately went into party mode, as we had 2 World Champions in our group. Hannah Rae Finchamp was the overall amateur female winner and Lizzy Gruber was the 20-24 year age group World Champ. Relief and excitement filled our hearts and we shared in a fun night together.

Post-race photo with Hannah Rae and Liz

My family and I spend the next 5 days at Napili Beach in West Maui, playing in the ocean and soaking in the sun. We returned home with enough amazing photos to fill a book, and memories that will last a lifetime. Swimming and snorkeling with my boys was seriously one of the funnest things I have ever done with them. The animal lovers that they are were in high heaven, as we swam around identifying creatures that until then, they had only seen in books. It was magical.

Hanging Loose!

Keller and I enjoyed many sunrise mornings on our beach!

As I look back on this year, I can't help but smile. All of these races have taken our family to some amazing places, and introduced us to so many incredible people. It has become so much more than the competition, and more about the lifestyle we choose. Having a goal, pushing our bodies, eating with intention, being together, and sharing these experiences with others.

Once again, the advice from a friend long before I had kids seems fitting. " Find something that your family likes to do together, and do a lot of it."